At the end of 2022, I decided to take a six-month sabbatical.

I wanted time for myself, free from responsibilities, to explore my own mind, travel, reflect on the last 37 years and figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life.

Six months turned into four years. I did travel the world. I did explore my own mind. I never figured out what I want to do with the rest of my life. And maybe that’s the answer: that I don’t need to know.

I can do what feels right now. I can fill my days with the things that excite me and that I’m curious about, and go to bed every night knowing I gave it everything, that I enjoyed it, that I’m happy.

Do that day after day and I don’t think you can ever regret such a life.

Here’s what’s keeping me curious at the moment.

Spiritual life

I’ve always been drawn to the idea of cultivating a beautiful inner world. A mind that’s truly present, and the habits that help me feel happy, motivated, confident and grateful.

A lot of things help me get there: enough sleep and never waking up to an alarm, good food, no substances, limited phone use, abstaining, training, ice baths, saunas, meditation, reading, podcasts, nature, friends. I make them a priority.

Being a dad

It’s my biggest dream to be a dad. After a lot of research I decided to do it as a single dad, through surrogacy. I’ve found an agency in Mexico to facilitate the process and I’m hoping to start next year.

My obstacle right now is finding an egg donor. You can pick someone from an egg bank easily enough, but that’s never sat well with me. I want a donor who is known, and who’s open to contact if my son chooses it one day. I’m actively looking for that person.

In the meantime I’m doggy dad to Bobby, a mini Schnauzer I got three years ago. He’s my first dog and I can’t begin to explain what he means to me, or how much fun it is doing life together. If this is what it feels like with a dog, I can’t imagine what it will be with a kid.

Writing

I write every day. Usually hundreds of words, some days thousands. It’s how I think. I journal, I reflect, I work out what I actually believe about something by writing it down.

Almost none of it goes anywhere. I haven’t sent a mailer in over ten months, and there’s a finished book sitting unpublished on my hard drive.

The reason is the same for both. Writing publicly brings a lot of incoming, opportunities and arguments both, and I optimise for a free mind above almost everything else. Every open item costs me a little bit of peace.

I’m trying to find a version of this that works: writing for the outside world without the noise that usually comes with it. Comments off, no replies.

Business and investments

When I started my sabbatical four years ago I stopped all formal work, and I was lucky to have business partners who could carry on running the two businesses I still had interests in: The Beancounter, an accounting firm, and Wamly, an HR software company.

This year I started helping The Beancounter implement an AI strategy to future-proof the business. As someone who has always loved coding and building, I’m in love with what AI can do today and I’m completely obsessed with building again. Most mornings I’m up at 05h00, hoodie on, AirPods in, building systems for the team to use. There’s no title and nobody’s waiting on me, but I’d be lying if I called it nothing. It’s the closest thing to work I’ve done in four years, and I’m enjoying it more than I expected to.

I also exited a big part of my shareholding in Wamly recently, which was a great milestone.

Other than that I’m managing some investments, with a ten-year-plus view. Let time do its thing.

Keeping fit

I started calisthenics recently and absolutely love it. I train with a coach twice a week on the beach. Good people, outdoors, getting stronger, and it’s helped the handstands I’ve been practising for years.

I also joined a rollerblading class, which I want to master. Other than that: running, cycling, yoga.

Spanish

I’ve lived in Barcelona for almost five years and my Spanish still isn’t where I want it. This month I hired a private teacher. We do an hour, six days a week, and I study another hour on my own.

I love speaking another language and I’m determined to be fluent, but the process is frustrating. I suppose that’s true of anything new.

I’ve also pulled out an old trick: do the hardest thing first. So we have the call at the start of the day.

Relationships

Building connections in a new country hasn’t been easy. It’s one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced, for a lot of reasons, but I know it matters and I keep making the effort.

I’m also dating again.

Travels

Since the sabbatical started I’ve been to South Africa, Scotland, India (a ten-day silent meditation retreat), Morocco, Israel (before the war), Southeast Asia (the Philippines, Indonesia, Thailand), Peru, Brazil, the United States, England, Malta, Australia and New Zealand, and I’ve explored Spain extensively. I love the idea of being a nomad, but I’ve realised I still want a home base, and for now that’s Barcelona.

Staying in Spain

I’m applying for long-term residency here. My first application was rejected, which made me really sad and stressed. I’ve reapplied. If it doesn’t come through, I’ll have to reassess my future completely.

For someone who spent their whole life working and hustling, stepping back and not feeling guilty about being unproductive has been a challenge. But I’ve come to think this might be the better way to live: do some work, stay creative, and leave space for everything else you want from a life.